How “regular sex” contributes to the gender gap in orgasms

There is a wealth of evidence that there is a gender gap in orgasms. The research on sexual practices and relationship contexts has shown that, during partnered, heterosexual sexual encounters, a lack of variation in sexual activities and an absence of clitoral stimulation are contributing to women having fewer orgasms than men. If it is widely known that sexual practices focused on clitoral stimulation increase women’s likelihood to orgasm, why are couples not engaging in these types of sexual activities? In this chapter, we examine heteronormative, gendered beliefs about what it means to “have sex,” and the implications of those meanings. Our interviews with cisgender men and women who have engaged in heterosexual sex across Canada suggests that heteronormative understandings of what counts as sex prioritizes penile stimulation over clitoral stimulation, contributing to the gender gap in orgasms.